Many women question why they cannot have kids when they want to. A select group of these women may not realize that they are dealing with Endometriosis. For many people, especially women, their life is centered around having kids. When they cannot, there is a cloud of confusion and uncertainty. Endometriosis consumes around 10% of all women. It is hard to detect because it cannot be diagnosed at 100% value until someone is surgically opened up. Endometriosis is chronic and a leading problem in infertility due to the lack of diagnosis at an early age. This leads to the question, is having kids central to ones own identity, and how can the inability to have kids affect people, specifically women?
There are many Endometriosis symptoms, some of which may never lead a patient to question if they have it. The main symptoms include painful and very heavy periods, diarrhea and/or constipation, a need to urinate frequently, and painful intercourse. Although these are all pointers towards the issue, "20–25% of patients are asymptomatic" (Bulletti). People who have Endometriosis, which is chronic, also deal with intense pelvic pain. The symptoms mentioned above can correlate with IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) or Fibromyalgia, making it even harder to diagnose Endometriosis. This is where the problem lies; many women who deal with Endometriosis do not know or never find out until they cannot have kids. As the problem is not getting attention and the patient's symptoms are getting worse, pain-wise and physically, it becomes a more pressing issue than pain management.
Infertility, as mentioned, is a common side effect of Endometriosis. "30 to 50% of women with Endometriosis are infertile" (Bulletti). This can come as a difficulty to many women who want to have kids. As said before, there is, in fact, a problem because even those people who are asymptomatic may question the reasoning behind why they are not able to have kids. The uterine cells that grow within the uterus grow outside of the uterus and in your bowels; this is Endometriosis. If not treated or managed, the cells that grow outside can block certain aspects of one's fallopian tubes and other surrounding organs. "Endometriosis may obstruct the tube and keep the egg and sperm from uniting" (Mayo Clinic). Once the tissue grows in and builds up, there is no treating or going back at that point; once someone's infertile, they are infertile. The only way to have a life where you can recreate with Endometriosis is to diagnose young to manage the problem in order to higher the chances of having kids. This leads people to question how does having kids affects the identity of women?
From an evolution standpoint, having kids is indeed central to a woman's identity. From a long-standing societal perspective, people have thought that all women grow, get married, and have kids. It is of no question that everyone is different. Therefore, life events should not be the same for everyone. Society is indeed becoming more progressive, allowing mothers to have more than just "being a mom" as their identity. An article on Medium mentions, "I'm More Than a Mother, It is part of my identity, not my whole character" (Daily). Being able to have motherhood only as part of your identity makes it more enjoyable to think about for women. When it is all-consuming, it can affect a relationship or marriage as well. This is because men do not have to deal with the physicality of bearing a child. "The role of motherhood is seen by society as central to a woman's identity. Parenthood is more salient for women's self-conceptions than for men's" (Simon, 1992). Society tells us it is more critical towards a woman's identity than a male's. Still, many women need to bear a child even if it is not everything about their identity.
Although childbirth is decreasing, it is still essential for most women to have kids. Therefore it is always hurtful to find out one cannot use a part of their body that is so beautiful. Endometriosis is one of the more common disorders in which causes infertility. With that being said, most people who deal with anything wrong in their bodies would be upset. Given this information, it can be concluded that women do not want to follow the rules, especially today, and have everything planned out for them. People want to rebel against the norm and the judgment of not having kids. That does not mean that they do not view having kids as a considerable part of their identity, but women may want more than to have kids. All women have a mother instinct, which is a part of many women's identities. However, it does not have to be all of the identity.
Regardless, the inability to have kids is still very heartbreaking and scary. The inability to have kids can cause a considerable loss of purpose in specific aspects of a woman's life. With that being said, having kids can also change a woman's identity in a good way. Endometriosis is just one of the many bumps in the road that can cause problems and mess with a woman's ability to create life. A study mentions there is "psychological suffering with devastating effects on psychological well-being of infertile couples" (Hasanpoor-Azghdy). Not only does the effect of infertility affect the woman, but it affects the people who care about them or the people who rely on them to have kids. It is heartbreaking to think that something so crucial to women can be torn down.
As mentioned, Endometriosis can be a common way for women to become infertile. Although there is no "cure" for Endometriosis, there are ways to manage it and create a space where it does not ruin your reproductive organs. Many resources mention ideas for treating pain. "Initial treatment is typically use of combined oral contraceptive pills, which are effective in decreasing pain as well as in preventing postoperative recurrence" (Nezhat). Other forms of pain treatment include pelvic floor therapy, hormone therapy, and a new medication explicitly created for Endometriosis. According to The Royal Woman's Hospital, "Surgery has been shown to improve fertility for women with mild Endometriosis. Treating more severe Endometriosis with Surgery, especially if there are cysts in the ovaries, also appears to improve fertility" (The Royal Women's Hospital). Although there are many ways to treat the pain, the only way to improve the chances of fertility is from a surgical standpoint. During the surgery, a laparoscopy method is used to see the intensity of the growths and then can be removed through the small holes used for the laparoscopic camera. It is essential for women who are dealing with Endometriosis to get a handle on the issue. Going forward, Endometriosis could cause infertility problems in which many women would be heartbroken to deal with.
Fertility and the ability to bear children are a part of women's identity but different than how society says it. Physically, women were born to bear children. Although this is true, that does not mean that this is the only part of a women's identity. It is important for women to create different aspects of their identity other than just having kids. It is within all women's means to choose when they have children if they can, although it is an integral part of many people's lives. Women do not owe it to anyone but themselves to have children. Society may have a timeline of having kids and when, however, there is no rulebook and no specific way women should have kids, as some women even have trouble doing so. To fulfill this part of women's life and identity, it is essential to watch out for vaginal reproductive issues, like Endometriosis, to make the odds of fertility higher. Discovering such an issue younger will not only improve your health and pain but will not limit your options. It is always good to at least leave the option open even if one is unsure of what they want. To conclude, although it can be believed that having children is, in fact, important to many women, this is just one part of a women's identity. A women's identity can have more than one purpose.
Works Cited
Bulletti, Carlo. “Endometriosis and Infertility.” NCBI US NATIONAL LIBRARY OF MEDICINE, 25 July 2010, www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2941592/.
Daily, Beth. “I'm More Than a Mother.” Medium, Invisible Illness, 24 July 2020, medium.com/invisible-illness/im-more-than-a-mother-db09ab746b93.
“Endometriosis.” Mayo Clinic, Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research, 16 Oct. 2019, www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/endometriosis/symptoms-causes/syc-20354656.
Hasanpoor-Azghdy, Seyede Batoo. “The Emotional-Psychological Consequences of Infertility among Infertile Women Seeking Treatment: Results of a Qualitative Study.” NCBI US NATIONAL LIBRARY OF MEDICINE, www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4009564/.
James, Jessica. “What Being a Mom Really Means.” HuffPost, HuffPost, 8 May 2016, www.huffpost.com/entry/what-being-a-mom-really-means_b_7242784.
Nezhat, Camran. “Optimal Management of Endometriosis and Pain : Obstetrics & Gynecology.” LWW, journals.lww.com/greenjournal/fulltext/2019/10000/optimal_management_of_endometriosis_and_pain.25.aspx.
Simon RW. Parental role strains, salience of parental identity and gender
differences in psychological distress. Journal of Health and Social
Behavior. 1992;33:25–35.
“Treating Endometriosis.” The Royal Women's Hospital, www.thewomens.org.au/health-information/periods/endometriosis/treating-endometriosis#Treatment%20to%20improve%20fertility.
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